10 things you’re ashamed of.

Yikes. Shame? Boo. I feel no shame! I am shameless!!

1. Sometimes I snap at people when I’m in a bad mood, but I always apologize when I catch myself at it.
2. Sometimes when I’m stressed out I procrastinate. I wasn’t always like that, so I’m trying to stamp out the tendency while it’s young.
3. I used to be big-headed. I still can be sometimes, but now I recognize it and I’m working on toning it down. I’ve been told it’s a symptom of being young.
4. When I was little I thought that those phone cards with the minutes on them were actually business cards, so I took a whole bunch of them from the counter at a store and pretended they were my own credit cards. When my dad asked me how I got those cards he looked really upset and it scared me, so I told him I found them on the sidewalk. It wasn’t until much later that I learned what they were.
5. I have a memory of saying the wrong thing in front of a large audience when I was in girl scouts. For the longest time I ranked that moment in the number one slot of the most embarrassing moments in my life. I’m ashamed I was embarrassed of something so lame for so long, haha.
6. I don’t know if I would call it “shame” but I do have some kind of interesting, unidentified reaction to my memory of the first time I ever cheated on a test. (Not that I made a habit of cheating on tests, for the record.) When I was in elementary school we were having a spelling test. The teacher asked us how to spell the word “school” and even though she’d covered up all the posters in her room, the door was open to the adjoining class and I saw a large banner that said “Welcome back to school!” on it. So I copied the spelling. I guess I should feel ashamed of cheating, but instead I feel pride at being resourceful.
7. Oh, something I’m ashamed of now but didn’t understand was in preschool I met a little black boy for the first time in my life. He was the only black kid in class and I’d never seen anyone like him before, and since he was different I didn’t want to play with him. I think I’d feel pretty bad about it now if I didn’t also distinctly remember he smelled funny.
8. Haha, I just remembered a time when a “friend” of mine told me that pine wax was actually honey, and she convinced me to try some of it. I got so sick and I’m ashamed I was such a dumb little child haha!
9. Um…gosh this is hard. Should I be ashamed I can’t think of much I’m ashamed of? Is shame that thing you feel when you haven’t forgiven yourself for something? What is the actual definition of shame? “A painful feeling of humiliation or distress caused by the consciousness of wrong or foolish behavior.” Yeah, there’s plenty of times I’ve been wrong and foolish but I don’t feel pain in response to it. Usually it’s just funny… or if it’s not funny, I just think ‘it is what it is’ and move on to something else.
10. I don’t think I have anything else to add, actually.